Becoming the You Who Has the Career You Want
There are a million resources online that will tell you how to make a career change, or get your dream job. They’ll walk through how to format your resume better, network more effectively, and how to nail that big interview. But very few of them talk about the most important step to take that comes way before any of those other actions: you need to decide to become the person who has the career you want.
Here’s why: if you want to get a specific job, or have a specific career, you need to not only think that you’re capable of being successful at it, but also start thinking like the person who already has the job/career you want. Why? Because your thoughts will always create your reality. What you think ultimately becomes the reality that you create.
So how do you start to think like the person who already has what you want? You start by shifting your self identity.
What is a self identity? A self identity (sometimes known as a “self concept”, or “self structure”) is, by definition, “A collection of beliefs about yourself that make up how you define yourself.” So this can be something like “I am a coach, I am a Mom, I am a dentist”. Or it can be related to something more personality based, or internal, such as “I am an optimist, I am impatient, I am organized”.
The important word here when we look at the definition of “self identity” is the word “BELIEFS”. A self identity is a collection of beliefs - and beliefs are just thoughts you think over and over.
This is the key. Why? Because thoughts are optional, and changeable. Or, as I like to say, thoughts are written in pencil. Facts, on the other hand, are written in pen. They are neutral, and they can’t be changed.
A few simple examples:
Facts about me:
My birthday is April 5th
I have hazel eyes
I’m 5’6
Where as, thoughts that I have about myself are:
I love personal development work
I’m moody
I’m a big reader
I love working out
These are all thoughts - even if they feel like facts (which thoughts often do!). But the key is that, while I can’t change the facts listed above, I can change any of those thoughts. I don’t HAVE to be “moody”, for example. That’s just a thought I have about myself, so I can change that if I want to.
So the things that we identify with- or what makes up our self identity - are totally within our power to change.
A few ways I’ve done this in my own life include:
Going from, “I’m not a dog person” as part of my self identity to “I’m a dog person” once I had dogs
Going from, ”I don’t believe in life coaching” as part of my self identity, to “Life coaching is extremely useful” once I started getting coached.
Going from “I don’t travel” as part of my identity, (I didn't have a passport until I was 26) - to, having lived/worked/traveled to over 30 countries by the time I turned 40.
When it comes to careers this same idea applies. We think - “I’m a teacher, I’m a coach, I’m an engineer, I’m in sales, I’m in media, I’m in fitness, I work in nonprofits…” We grab on to our professional titles and we then think this is who we are.
So when we want to make a career pivot, and try something new, we’re often BLOCKED by our self identity, because we confuse job titles/careers, with the thoughts about our self identity. We think your jobs are WHO we are, and if we want to make a change and do something new professionally, we often stop ourselves by getting stuck in some version of, “That’s not who I am….(or, “I don’t know how/I dont have the skills/I’m too old/it’s too late/I could never….”)”
We so easily forget that our self identity is changeable!
A few more examples to drive this home:
Someone may think, “I work in a corporation right now, but want to have my own business. But I can’t because entrepreneurship is risky, I’m not a risk-taker.”
Someone may think, “I went to school for law but now I want to be a photographer. But I can’t because I’ve never been a creative person, and that’s a creative career.”
Someone may think, “I haven't worked in a few years and now I want to go back to working, but I can’t because I have a lot of obligations and I’m a bad multitasker.”
Whether you are a risk-taker, or a creative person, or a multitasker are not titles you’re born with like royalty; they’re not permanent traits like your eye color or height - they’re just THOUGHTS you have about yourself. So if you want to be any of those things - (or anything!) - you can. It just starts with changing your thoughts about yourself.
The reality when it comes to your self identity is this:
1.You are NOT your career. You are a person WITH a career - important distinction.
2.You can change who you are (your personality, your habits, your values, your thoughts, your actions) just like you can change your career and how you identify yourself in relation to that career (I am a doctor; I am a sales rep; I am an entrepreneur)
What it comes down to is: you are who you think you are. And you can always change that. You are not locked into anything
The key here is to look at who you are now, and look and who you want to be, and then DECIDE to make shifts to move towards being that person.
Remember that whatever you say after “I am” is what you will create more of.
This seems obvious, right? If you’re in sales, you probably say, “I am in sales” when asked about your career. Every time you do this, you’re reinforcing your professional identity as someone who is in sales.
Now, let’s say you’re in sales, but you want to make a career pivot and become a coach.
The self identity switch there is not only about you needing to start to actually SEE and FEEL yourself in that new role as a “coach” - but also it’s how you think about yourself during the process of making your career pivot.
So, following this example, if you want to go from being in sales to being a coach, even if you have all the coaching skills in the world, you’re going to get stuck if you don’t work on your self identity being someone who makes a career pivot. So if you have thoughts such as, “I’m someone who can't take that risk to leave my current career,” or “I’m someone who just needs the safety of my 9 - 5,” or “I’m someone who could never coach professionally….” then what do you think the chances are that you will actually move ahead with the pivot?
Pretty slim.
This is where self identity work comes in. It’s not just about identifying as someone who could go from “sales” to “coaching”, but it’s also about being someone who goes from, “I don’t know if I can make a career change….” to someone who thinks things like:
“I am someone who can change my career”
“I am someone who can take a financial risk and know I’ll be OK”
“I am someone who can learn the new skills I’ll need to be successful”
It's ALL a mindset switch.
But you have to see yourself and think yourself into the change before it will occur, because it’s your thoughts that lead to results.
You need to start thinking, “I am a coach” and lean into that; from THAT place, from THAT energy, what actions do you take?
You need to start thinking, “I can take a pay cut to go after my dream” or “I can go back to school” or “I can move industries with the transferable skills I have” in order to THEN take the actions to make that pivot you’re seeking.
Remember: it’s thoughts first, then results will follow. And your self identity is just a collection of thoughts. If you want to make your career pivot, you’ll want to start by changing your self identity - which just means, changing your thoughts about yourself.
How do you do this? Follow the 5 steps below:
1. Decide on purpose what the change is that you want to make.
For some of you it will be “I want to go from X profession to Y profession”.
For others, it will be, “I want to go from being scared of making a career change to being confident I can do it”. And still for others it will be both.
Wherever you are, the first step is to just decide, “what is the change I want to make?”
2. Say it before you’re ready
Next up - practice! Say it outloud, tell other people, and just get used to hearing the words come out of your mouth. I was saying “I’m a life coach” long before my business made any money because I decided I was a coach! And the more I said it the more I believed it, and the more the results followed.
3. Start visualizing it now
Journal about the version of you who has the career you want. Think about her when you’re driving or out for a run. When you’re deciding what actions to take, ask yourself, “What would THAT version of me do?”
4. Get around people who have this kind of thinking
It’s been said by a lot of people in the personal development space (and I’m not sure who said it first so I can’t give proper credit!) that,“We’re the average of the 5 people we spend the most time with”. So get around others who have changed careers or who are doing the thing you want. Get a coach who has done this or helped others. Spend time online looking for examples of people who have made the pivot you want. Start surrounding yourself - even virtually - with people, examples, stories that give your brain evidence that this is possible!
5. Start to live into it
If you want to have your own business, ask yourself “How would an entrepreneur spend her time? How would she dress? What would she think? How should she spend her money?” and start living into that.
We often think, “When I get THERE, then I’ll start doing X”. We think things like, “When I have a profitable business, I’ll hire help, or get a coach,” or “When I have made that career change I’ll start working out early in the morning to have more energy every day….” But the way you get what you want is by starting to live into it NOW.
You are who you decide you are. Self identity is not more complicated than that. So decide who you want to be, and start taking the steps to make it happen for yourself. It’s totally within reach, and there’s no reason to choose to believe otherwise.